Here we go, most dreaded day of the year. I've only had a boyfriend on valentines day once, but that was in like eighth grade and he didn't even get me anything.
I can't honestly try to explain what today means, or what it's really about, all I know is that if you're a good boyfriend/husband/fiancé it should just be a day where you get to spoil your girlfriend/wife/fiancé even more than usual.
But for me it's usually just another opportunity to make me feel alone. And it's not that I need/want a boyfriend, and it's not even about the flowers or the goofy teddy bears. It's just about the fact that I wish someone wanted to be like that for me. I know very well what it's like to be unwanted. And I never deserved that. No one does.
Now you don't have to go crazy, boycotting valentines day, making depressing tweets or status updates. Just calm down. It'll be okay.
This year, for once, I'm not gonna let myself be all "woe is me..." and everything. Yeah, tomorrows a day about love, but you know what else it is? It's Tuesday. Just another day in February. Another opportunity for growth.
This year, for once, I'm not going to try so hard to lower my expectations just so I won't be disappointed. I always do that. I always try to expect the very least out of everyone because I'm afraid of getting hurt. And I can't live my life like that anymore. I don't know if anything significant will happen tomorrow, (or the day after that, or the day after that) but I know that at the end of the day, roses or no roses, boy or no boy, I can go to sleep satisfied because I never lost hope.
Miracles happen everyday. I'm going to start having faith.
Never lose hope.
